On 3/8/13 I had to say goodbye to my baby girl, Pippy. In the last few months since the loss of
her sister, we have bonded so much and were best buds. Pippy has always loved me but didn’t really
need me because she had her sister, but we have both been so lonely and lost
without Squealer that it brought us closer.
I could have kept her with me longer, but that would have
been selfish. She had labored
breathing, didn’t eat very well anymore, and when I took her to the vet they
suspected she had a huge (probably cancerous) growth in her stomach. I didn’t want to put her through a lot of
tests that were going to tell me it was a cancerous tumor because I had already
decided that due to her age I would not put her through anymore surgeries. I could have kept her comfortable on
medications and bought myself more time, but she was missing her sister so much
and to keep her alive would have been just for me and it had to be all about
her.
It was awful. I was
there all alone. I held her, told her I
loved her, told her that she was a pretty girl and such a good girl. I told her that her sister missed her and
that she would be seeing her really soon.
I told her not to be scared, her sister would be there waiting for her
at The Rainbow Bridge, and I assured her that although I am extremely
hysterical right now that I would be okay.
I told her I would miss her and love her FOREVER, but I needed to let
her go be with her sister. I then
hugged her tight and kissed her sweet little face and I let the tech take her
away.
I couldn’t go with her and be with her when she took her
last breath because guinea pigs are so small and it can be complicated they had
to take her in the back room to euthanize her.
So I sat there knowing that she was leaving me and that the next time I
saw her ----- she would be gone.
They brought her back to me all wrapped up in a towel. She was my beautiful sweet girl with
lifeless eyes. She was still warm. I held her for what seemed like forever and
honestly I did not want to let her go.
I knew the next time I would see her she would just be ashes………it killed
me.
I know I did the right thing, but it was so hard. I find comfort in thinking of Pipsqueak and
Squealer up at The Rainbow Bridge, chasing each other, flinging hay and
chatting up a storm (they had a lot to catch up on).
Then I had to drive myself home, and that night it was
pouring rain out to add to my misery.
I honestly don’t know how I made it home. I was hysterical and every time I pulled
myself together the crying would start all over again. I am crying now while I am writing this and
this happened 5 months ago.
Pipsqueak was my last baby.
I do not have any little furry critters to come home to, to take care
of, to love. I miss talking to
her. I talked to her all the time. I have a huge hole in my heart and I feel so
lost and empty without her. I cannot
get another pet right now, but when my circumstances change, I will have
another furry friend to love. I will
never forget any of my babies and there is no replacing any of them ever, but
there are so many other babies out there who needs me…….who need love…….and as
soon as I can, I plan on rescuing one……