Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Want to start by saying that this is an absolutely true story and nothing was made up or exaggerated.  Unfortunately to my horror this happened to me.

When I went to Panda Express over the weekend I am standing in line behind this man and woman.   The man is small and homely (sorry I’m being honest) the woman is big…..tall and heavy……frumpy and plain (again, just being honest).  They order this huge amount of food.   Felt they needed to explain that it would be a few meals for them (I don’t judge and I certainly didn’t ask!)  Then for some reason (I don’t know why these things always happen to me!) they felt the need to tell me that they are a couple, very happy together for over 25 years.   Okay TMI….. but you’re probably thinking they were just being friendly…..well maybe they were until they took it to the next level! 
Are you ready?!

Are you sure?!

Okay here it goes……don’t say I didn’t warn you!
They proceed to tell me how happy they are and how they must have been doing something right all these years and then the short little man gets behind the tall large woman grabs her from behind……are you sure you want to read this, one last chance to stop yourself!……grabs her boobs (in public!!!!) squeezes (squeezes and fondles for what seems like FOREVER!)  them and shouts “Mine mine mine!”  Can you say fucking creepy!  I was horrified and I am going to be scarred for life!

Monday, April 23, 2012

Have to get this off my chest ……..

There is this girl in my office who I cannot pretend to like or even be cordial to….she rides my last nerve just knowing she is in the vicinity!  She is 22 completely obnoxious and very loud with the most irritating of laughs!   She literally laughs at everything someone says to her.   She is very vain…..she goes around calling herself awesome and has pictures of herself everywhere so she can see them.  She blatantly says she is good-looking……seriously?! …..who talks that way!  No one I associate with that’s for sure!  She is everything I am not…..she is fake.   I hate fake people!   I may be a lot of things and people may say this or that about me, but they can never call me fake because then they are just stupid!

So why do people flock around this dumb obnoxious fake loud irritating bitch of a girl?!  Did I leave out any adjectives?  Especially the men……are they that shallow?  Do they just like the fake attention she gives them!   Do they just think with only one thing…..hope not all of them follow this stereotype!   She has nothing to offer them.   I just don’t get it.   I HATE her!

Maybe there is that part of me that is jealous that she is 22, but that’s where I draw the line.   I wouldn’t want to be like her in any other way.  There is a reason they call me kranky!

Hearse Sighting at the Target Parking Lot......can't think of a more appropriate pic for my blog! No dead bodies inside.....darn! Can think of a few people we can swing by and pick up!

Sunday, April 22, 2012


It’s been awhile since I’ve written.   This blogging thing has me really discouraged.   It is supposed to be simple and fun but for the technologically challenged…….not so much!   So I will start with this rant and then take another shot at it.
First I want to start off by saying, “WTF is it so bright out at 6:30 a.m!”  You would think the one saving grace of having to get up at the crack of dawn is that you don’t have to drive with the sun in your eyes.   You are already stressed out and grumpy about having to go to work…..it is an evil joke!   The devil has something to do with it, I just know it!
Then onto our lovely California heart of the scummy valley roads!   In my area they have so many freeway on and off ramps closed……it is a huge inconvenience and honestly I don’t see any improvements in the roads so far and it has been a year since they started this nightmare.   Then I am so tired of our roads having holes and being all broken.  Where do all our tax dollars go?  What are they doing when they put up their road construction signs and close down our roads?  Are they just trying to piss us off?   So not only do we have to deal with overpopulated roads but they are all broken and maybe even closed…..yeah, I love driving! GGGRRRRRR!!!!!
The gas station……..!!!!!!!!   First of all the prices are outrageous!   I am going to have to sell a kidney if I want to keep putting gas in my car!   And if the prices are going to be so high, is it too much to ask that if I want to wash my windows that there be a squeegee available?!  An added treat would to have a squeegee, water, and paper towels all available at the same time.   Then today not only could I not wash the windows but the receipt did not come out all the way, tore and the bottom half stuck in the machine!   Really!    $48 dollars to fill my car and I can’t even get a receipt!   
What is up with people’s headlights?  I have noticed at night that if someone is driving behind me that it seems that they have their high beams on……they seriously blind me, and if it is some big monster truck or SUV you might as well forget about it.  So if I don’t have the sun in my eyes in the morning I have headlights blinding me at night!   I ask you, does this seem fair?
I’m sorry if I offend anyone but I absolutely HATE people who park their cars or monster trucks in parking spaces backwards!   Especially when in small public parking lots!   Really?!   Are you more special than the rest of us!   I hate you!
What is wrong with those people who go down an aisle in the parking lot the wrong way and they act like it’s your fault?  
I hate those people who are just bullies on the road and act as if they are the only people who need to get someplace.

Okay I think I have covered my road rage issues for the moment……….